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PREVIOUS CHAPTER

Parallel World - “The Bad Kid Survival Strategy” Chapter 13

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Location: Starmony Dorm Theater Room

Hajime:

There really is no way to know what Ideia-sama is thinking, is there… I’m even starting to think they’ve just gone on a reckless rampage.

Tomoya:

Yet despite all of that, they’re pretty much acting like everything’s the same as it’s always been.

When it came to our Parallel Ra*bits proposal, they sent us their wishes of support like usual and even made financial donations for our benefit.

Nazuna:

Yeah. And they’ve gone on radio shows telling everyone to show Ra*bits their support…

Like, whose fault do you think it is that we’re in this mess in the first place? Pisses me off.

Oh well. There’s no point in trying to understand how someone’s mind works when they’re that eccentric. Oddballs like that are as unpredictable as a natural disaster.

Tomoya:

When you say that, it does have a ring of conviction to it, Nii~chan… Especially considering you’re one of the people who managed to survive your senior year surrounded by oddballs like Hibiki-senpai and the rest of his herd.

Nazuna:

Yeah. Seems like the world is claiming that our time has come, and this is bound to be our lucky year.

But I wanna yell back that it’s not so easy being right in the middle of a controversy like this.

Tomoya:

Ahaha. Sounds like they’re saying “our time” is a pretty unlucky one, which bugs me a lot too.

Well, I guess I can’t help it if that’s the sort of thing people are saying. Man… For real, what are we going to do?

I can’t think of a thing. We can’t be like our Trickstar senpai and manage to pull off a complete 180 to get ourselves out of a huge pinch and conquer whatever we’re up against.

Though I guess the way they’re able to break through walls of adversity while we can’t is the reason I admire them so much.

Oh to be with Hokuto-senpai right now… If only he would embrace me gently in his arms and whisper softly in my ear: “It’s going to be okay, Tomoya. I still love you,” the way he always does.

Hajime:

Does that version of Hidaka-senpai even exist?

Tomoya:

At least let me have my fantasies… Especially since reality is such a mess right now.

Mitsuru:

Reality… Fantasy…

Tomoya:

Hm? What’s wrong, Mitsuru? Why have you started mumbling to yourself?

Come on, give me a break… You’re supposed to be the most stable one out of all of us. If you start losing your mind, Ra*bits are completely doomed.

Mitsuru:

No, it’s just that Guu~chan said somethin’ like that. Wait, I’ll try to remember properly.

Tomoya:

Is “Guu~chan” supposed to be Mikejima-senpai’s little sister who helped you come up with this tactic?

Nazuna:

What’s this? What are you talking about? I feel like I haven’t been told anything about this?

Hajime:

Hehe. So, there’s this girl that Mitsuru-kun has been pretty smitten with these days; or rather, someone he’s been getting very close to.

Nazuna:

What? What?! No way? Mitsuru-chin? Getting involved in something romantic…?!

Hajime:

That's right~ Tomoya-kun and I are breathlessly watching their relationship bloom. It’s really making my heart flutter.

Tomoya:

I dunno if I’d go that far, but Hajime is weirdly invested in it… 

You’re really into this sort of thing, aren’t you~? When it comes to anything related to someone’s love life.

Hajime:

Of course I am! I mean, isn’t it so unexpected that the Mitsuru-kun we’ve known all this time would be involved in something so exciting and heart-pounding? Am I the only one who thinks so?

Tomoya:

It’s not that I don’t get it. But it’s not something that other people should get involved in, so you should really leave him be.

Hajime:

But! I can’t just sit back and watch! He was supposed to be paying a visit to this girl, and yet he’d planned on taking her some bug he caught as a gift!

I made sure to stop him! And then I made him pick out flowers with me instead!

Nazuna:

Maybe she’s the type of girl who likes bugs~?

Hajime:

It’s not about whether she likes them or not! It’s about doing things romantically—or rather, in the way people constantly fantasize about!

Nazuna:

You shouldn’t push your own fantasies onto other people though~? Weirdly enough, you’re kinda guilty of doing that a lot, Hajime-chin.

When you push a fantasy version of someone onto them, it quickly becomes too much to bear.

That, too, is me speaking from experience.

Mitsuru:

—Oh, I got it! I remembered! The stuff about fantasies!

Nazuna:

Whoa?! You scared me?! Aren’t I always telling you not to suddenly start yelling in such a loud voice~?

Tomoya:

What did you remember, Mitsuru? Something important?

Mitsuru:

Yeah! Super important! But it’s been a whole week since I last talked to Guu~chan, so I don’t remember everything in detail…

But what’s important is what’s gonna unfold from now on. Everything up to now was just layin’ everything in place.

Hajime:

What? Huh? So there’s still more to come? “Parallel Ra*bits” isn’t just about seeing dozens of different versions of ourselves to decide which direction we’re going to go from now on?

I thought it was about seeing all of these parallel world versions of ourselves and then picking out which one looks best and suits us the most.

Then after we’d picked out a direction to go in other than “cute”, that’s the way we’d continue our activities from now on?

Tomoya:

Though in the end, it sure feels like we won’t easily be able to find a “new style of clothes” to wear.

Mitsuru:

That’s fine!

Nazuna:

Who are you, Tensai Bakabon?*

Mitsuru:

I have no idea who that is, but anyway! It’s just as important to make everyone think that this “new style of clothes” doesn't suit us at all! That’s what she said!

Tomoya:

What do you mean…?

Mitsuru:

Uuu~! Since I’m so stupid and Guu~chan is so smart, I can only understand about half the stuff she says!

But this much I know! If we carry out her strategy perfectly, then it’ll save us all. This is how we’re gonna get ourselves outta this huge pinch.

Hajime:

A-Are you sure? We really seem to have hit rock bottom right now though?

Mitsuru:

Yeah! Absolutely!

But I want Tomo-chan to be the one to decide if we’re really gonna go all the way and put the full plan into action.

At this point we can still choose to turn back. Everyone will be able to laugh it off as Ra*bits just doing something a little weird. They’ll be all: "Aww what little dummies, aren’t they so cute?"

But if we keep going forward from here, they probably won’t be able to just laugh it off as us being cute anymore.

Tomoya:

Just what is this plan…?

Mitsuru:

“Mashiro Tomoya.”

Tomoya:

Hm? Wh-Why did you use my full name all of a sudden…?

Mitsuru:

I’m just repeatin’ what Guu~chan said.

—“Mashiro Tomoya. Do you have the guts to become a bad boy?”

Tomoya:

……?

–

*A manga series about a dimwitted-boy.

NEXT CHAPTER

–

Translation by:

Ara @. nazunyan427

Proofreader: 

Sophie @.ra_bits_daisuki

Parallel World - “Cuteness is Unjust” Chapter 8

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Location: Tomoya’s Dorm Room

(10 minutes later)

Tomoya:

I-I’m really sorry about this.

Hajime:

N-Nii~chan ♪ Shall I make you some tea? I promise it’s good ♪

Mitsuru:

Ahaha! Hajime-chan, sometimes when ya mess up, you offer to make some tea to gloss over it!

Hajime:

A-And why are you laughing like this has nothing to do with you? You fell asleep too, Mitsuru-kun, so you’re just as guilty as me?!

Mitsuru:

What’s so wrong about fallin’ asleep when you’re tired~?

If anything, the way you wouldn’t wake up even when the rest of us were makin’ so much noise must mean that you’re pretty tired, Hajime-chan. Shouldn’t ya try to get more sleep each night?

Hajime:

D-Don’t change the subject! You’re the one who’s in trouble right now!

Tomoya:

Ahaha. I remember when I used to see this kinda scene play out all the time. Hajime acting like a big brother and lecturing Mitsuru.

Hajime:

I-I’m not acting like a big brother, I really am a big brother, you know? Back home! Don’t make fun of me! Whose side are you on, Tomoya-kun?!

Tomoya:

Anyway, now’s not the time to be squabbling amongst ourselves, right?

Nazuna:

Tomo-chin is right~ All of you take some deep breaths and calm down.

Hajime:

Uuu… In… And out…

Mitsuru:

In, out, in, out…

Hey, is there some sorta weirdly sweet perfume comin’ from the ceiling in here?

Tomoya:

Oh, sometimes Ayase-senpai lights things. It’s some sort of aroma something or other.

Hajime:

I feel like it might affect the flavor of the tea… Wait, no, never mind that.

Things got a little bit all over the place, but let’s go back to what we were talking about. Now that I had a decent nap, my head is much clearer and I feel like I could stay up all night chatting if needed.

Nazuna:

Right, that’s why we’re all here.

Mitsuru:

I got all tired while we were talkin’ earlier so I fell asleep! Wahaha☆

So I kinda forgot. What were we talkin’ about again?

Hajime:

Please don’t forget… It’s a very important topic.

Tomoya:

Right. And now that Nii~chan’s joined us again, let’s go back over things from the top.

Frankly speaking, this might be the greatest pinch Ra*bits have ever experienced.

Mitsuru:

Is it? But you guys looked way more gloomy back when we first got together around the spring of S2, or during last year’s Repayment Fest?

Tomoya:

To be honest, this still doesn’t feel like it’s actually happening… Part of that is probably because Bishojo-senpai feels like a fictional character who’s totally detached from our world.

And I’m still in shock that something like this would actually happen to us.

Nazuna:

I get it~ It’s the feeling of shock you get when your brain can’t process reality so you just freeze up.

(I felt the same that day when I was on stage as part of Valkyrie. The music stopped all of a sudden, and my head went completely blank…

I was totally freaking out when I suddenly heard Mika-chin singing.

I can still remember it clearly to this day.)

~...♪

Tomoya:

Hm…? Why did you suddenly start singing, Nii~chan?

Mitsuru:

Starmony Dorm is supposed to be totally soundproofed, so it should be fine to start singin’ out loud even at night, right?

Tomoya:

No, that’s not what I’m concerned about…

Nazuna:

…This is what Bishojo-senpai is trying to steal away from us.

Tomoya:

……

Nazuna:

They’re trying to shut us up.

They’re trying to strip away the outfits we put our heart into crafting for ourselves by picking out the materials from scratch and making sure they suit us. They claim this style doesn’t work for us.

They even got our agency to take action by putting pressure on them.

Hajime:

I-I’m sure there’s a profound reason behind Ideia-sama’s thought process—

They said that they’re fond of us and that they’re doing this out of concern.

Nazuna:

And what if that’s just something they’re saying? It wasn’t that long ago that parents and teachers used corporal punishment on kids and claimed it was for their own benefit. How’s it any different from that?

Hajime:

But Ideia-sama has done so much for me all this time.

Back when I was going through a rough patch, they took me in and acted so kindly to me, making sure to look out for me.

Right now, while I may not be perfect, I’m praised for my cuteness as an idol and I’ve managed to earn a place I belong to.

A lot of that is, of course, thanks to Ra*bits, but there’s no doubt that Ideia-sama has played a huge role too.

Ideia-sama has become like a shield guarding me from behind and exercising their influence over everyone around me.

Mitsuru:

But if they should’ve been protectin’ ya like that all along, why are they suddenly tryin’ to destroy us? I seriously don’t get them at all!

Hajime:

W-Well, that’s because… The situation has changed…

Nazuna:

The thing about the utopia for female idols? That’s a questionable story if you ask me.

Hajime:

Wh-What do you mean…?

NEXT CHAPTER

–

Translation by:

Ara @. nazunyan427

Proofreader: 

Sophie @.ra_bits_daisuki

Parallel World - “Cuteness is Unjust” Chapter 6

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Location: Rhythm Link Office

Ideia-sama:

“And so, in despair with the state of things as they are now, the female idols who’ve lived in such discontent have demanded their own new world.”

Hajime:

So that’s why a Utopia for female idols is being founded overseas…?

Ideia-sama:

“Yes. At first, ES proudly declared that it would be a safe haven for all idols.”

“And yet. The ‘idols’ ES spoke of did not include people like us.”

Tomoya:

B-But you’re a man, aren’t you, Bishojo-senpai?

Ideia-sama:

“Yes. I am a ‘bishojo.’ Exactly as you have called me.”

“That is the name I am called, how I identify, and how I have lived proudly by.”

“And so, I want to be an ally to the people I feel are the same as me.”

“Those girls and I, we are one and the same.” 

Hajime:

So do you plan on transferring to that utopia for female idols, Ideia-sama…?

Ideia-sama:

“Yes. But just between you and me. So long as I keep it a secret, I can continue to put pressure on this agency by hinting that I may or may not transfer.”

Tomoya:

You mean like you’re doing now?

Ideia-sama:

“What happened to the good little boy speaking to me so politely up until now?”

Nazuna:

…I don’t get it. You’re going on and on about this utopia for female idols, but what does that have to do with you demanding us to give up our cuteness?

Ideia-sama:

“It is simply out of the kindness in my heart.”

“I happen to like you boys a lot. I support all of you.”

Tomoya:

Huh? Uh, really? …Thank you very much?

Ideia-sama:

“Speaking politely again I see. You really should learn the social skill of acting in an amicable way—at least on the surface—even when you’re dealing with a potential enemy or someone you dislike.”

“Though I suppose acting otherwise is proof that you are still children.”

“And that is precisely what is so loveable about you, and why I worry.”

“Let me make a prediction. If you continue to use cuteness as your main selling point, you will end up clashing with the female idol utopia that’s bound to form in the near future.”

“That is, you will end up in stiff competition against the countless number of adorable “bishojo” idols who will rise up.”

Tomoya:

And as a result, we’re no longer going to prosper… Is that what you’re trying to say?

Ideia-sama:

“Yes. Without a doubt. Why, even now, I get the impression that you’re losing ground against Japan’s female idols in terms of financial success.”

“Perhaps even I might be included among them—the endless number of fictitious female idols born from all of the manga, anime, and video-sharing sites Japan has to offer.”

“And when you’re up against such incessant, formidable competition, you’ll be unable to utilize your cuteness—bound to continue tasting one bitter experience after another.”

Tomoya:

(That’s true… I do get the feeling that we’re getting less and less jobs focused on that line of work.)

(Especially me, and maybe Mitsuru too—to the point where we’re praised more for just going in a cooler direction.)

Ideia-sama:

“Fictional idols will never age.”

“Therefore, there is a huge demand for those with the loveliness you would associate with youth. I, too, have given in to those demands.”

“But you will all age. It won’t be long before you have completely grown up. 

Neoteny—that is, adult animals who retain their juvenile features—does exist. However—”

“—Humans are creatures who will steadily grow and develop to reach maturity.”

“To force yourself to retain the loveliness of youth is an impossibility.”

“Mitsuru-san, haven’t you been troubled by growing pains and the beard you might grow one day?”

Mitsuru:

Why do ya hafta keep on turnin’ back to me?

Ideia-sama:

“Because you and I are alike.”

Hajime:

(Now that I think about it… Out of the dozens of rumors that surround Ideia-sama, there is one that suspects they’ve even had their own body modified in order to preserve their cuteness.

I thought it was just part of the lore of the character they play.

And besides, Ideia-sama uses a CG image of themself, so it’s not really a huge deal if that character model has supposedly been modified in some way.

But what if the person behind Ideia-sama has had that kind of surgery too…?)

Ideia-sama:

“It’s because I like all of you that I don’t want you to destroy yourselves by forcing yourself to live in an impossible way.”

“And that’s why I want to strip away the corset of ‘cuteness’ bound to you so tightly and set you free.”

Hajime:

……

Ideia-sama:

“I don’t mind if you resent me for it. I’m simply acting according to my own ego.”

“However, I do want you to think it over in detail.”

“Is this truly the style that suits you best of all?”

Nazuna:

……

Ideia-sama:

“No, let me rephrase that. You sell yourselves as cute.”

“But are you really so cute that discarding the style you’ve worn so far would be such a regrettable loss to the world?”

“Are you cuter than beautiful girls? Than animals? Than babies? Than angels and fairies?”

“If you have the confidence to proclaim that you, Ra*bits, are far cuter than any of them…”

“...then come to me and boast that you are what it means to be cute idols, ‘newbies.’”

“...Don’t underestimate cuteness.”

Tomoya:

……

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Translation by:

Ara @. nazunyan427

Proofreader: 

Sophie @.ra_bits_daisuki

Parallel World - “Cuteness is Unjust” Chapter 4

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Location: Rhythm Link Office

Nazuna:

Uh.

“Bishojo-senpai”, as in, the same major figure in the industry who took a huge liking to Hajime-chin?

Hajime:

Yes… For some reason, this person* has reached out to me and taken me under their wing.

Ideia-sama is extremely well-known so you’re probably aware of this already, but, let me think… One, two, three… They debuted about 19 years ago, so they’re a veteran idol in the industry.

They’re an incredible senpai who, ever since their debut, is constantly at the forefront of the industry—gathering success after success.

They’re one of the Top Ranking idols in the business, someone who could go head-to-head with Hidaka Seiya.

I’ve no doubt that they are, in both name and reality, what you’d call a super-idol.

Ideia-sama:

“I’m flattered that you’d speak with such high regards about me, but allow me to make one amendment.”

“I have never once referred to myself as an idol.”

“I find it wholly inappropriate. Such a term goes completely against my will. I will not be referred to by such an unsightly word.”

Hajime:

What…? …Oh, umm, sorry about that.

Ideia-sama:

“I am an Utaite.”*

“All other components are merely there to embellish my voice.”

“Idols are no more than the indecent concept of a false image created by a madman long ago, and I can’t stand the word being superimposed on my beauty.”

“I will grow nauseous.”

Tomoya:

What? Err, so, I have a stupid question… If that’s all right.

So, this giant—I mean—this very large man here is “Bishojo-senpai”?

I wasn’t expecting that… “Bishojo-senpai” is famous for refusing to show their face in the media, so who they really are is a mystery, but still…

Ideia-sama:

“Ah, he is simply acting on my behalf. He also makes up part of Kirarai Dearu.”

“As for his name, you can call him ‘Kira-kun’ for the time being.”

“He basically takes my place whenever I need to hold in-person meetings with others.”

“We also have a songwriter we refer to as “Raru-san”—the three of us together form Kirarai Dearu.”

Tomoya:

Kira, Ideia, and Raru. Altogether, “Kirarai Dearu.”

Ideia-sama:

“Yes. It’s a play on words, or rather, we combined all of our names in the same way many bands and artists do.”

Tomoya:

Oh! So your voice is coming out of the PC Kira-kun-san is holding. I was so intimidated by him that I haven’t been able to look directly at him, so I didn’t even notice.

Ideia-sama:

“There’s no need to be so frightened. Despite his appearance, he’s a very sweet boy.”

Tomoya:

B-But why all this…?

Hajime:

I thought this was supposed to be pretty well known. If anything, I’m surprised you didn’t know about it, Tomoya-kun, considering you know so much about idols.

Tomoya:

Mhm~ It’s a different genre to what I like. I don’t know much about female idols, so I had no idea.

Hajime:

Oh, so to you Ideia-sama falls under the category of female idols? It’s true that that’s how they sell themself, but I do believe the real Ideia-sama is male.

Tomoya:

I did hear that before. They’re technically a guy, but since they’re even more beautiful than any girl, everyone refers to them as “Bishojo-senpai.”

Mitsuru:

Mhm~ You mean sorta like Arashi-chan-senpai?

Ideia-sama:

“Heh. I would prefer if you let me leave that part ambiguous. My whole selling point is that I am an enigma—an entity full of mysteries.”

Hajime:

Too many mysteries… I’ve worked with them countless times before and even run into them by chance, but every single time, they never show their real face. They always have someone act as a mediator and only communicate using their voice alone.

So I don’t actually have any idea who the real Ideia-sama is.

Tomoya:

But why go through all of this…?

Hajime:

There are all sorts of rumors, ranging from Ideia-sama being an extreme misanthrope, or that they’re stuck in a hospital room with an incurable disease, or that they’re not even a real person to begin with.

But the truth is a mystery. I do wonder what the reality is though?

Ideia-sama:

“That’s a secret. The more mystery there is to me, the more bewitching I become, no?”

Tomoya:

I-I can’t say I was expecting this. Or like, I’m pretty bewildered that you’re such an… intense person.

Err, Ideia-sama—no, wait. I’ll stick with Bishojo-senpai. I’m more used to that.

Why did you call us here today, Senpai?

Our agency told us that some major figure is furious with us.

Hajime:

Well, there’s no figure more major than this…

Ideia-sama tends to be treated like some passing fad, but the truth is, their popularity and financial success alone makes up the backbone of Rhythm Link’s prosperity.

Ideia-sama:

“Though this agency tends to treat me as a nuisance.”

“Especially since all of the staff who first supported me at the beginning have since moved on to other agencies or retired, no thanks to succumbing to political warfare.”

“I am the goose that lays their golden eggs. And so, I am an asset Rhythm Link cannot let go of; but that certainly doesn’t mean I am under their control.”

“I am an artifact from a dangerous point in time. They cannot tear me down, but they also lack the skill to make use of me appropriately.”

Mitsuru:

A-All of this stuff sounds so complicated… Man, you sure are different to what I expected. On TV and stuff, Bishojo-senpai always acts real friendly.

To be honest, I thought they were the same sorta person as me; someone who’s not all that smart.

Tomoya:

No, that’s just the sort of character they play. Think about it: there’s no way they actually speak like a princess right out of a manga in real life.*

Hajime:

Though there are a lot of people who speak in a quirky way at ES in general.

Ideia-sama:

“I will say that I’m a bit embarrassed by that detail, so I would prefer it if you didn’t probe too deeply.”

“In accordance with what was demanded from me at a certain point in time, there was a point where I made an appearance on a variety show using a CG version of myself.”

“But I wasn’t fully aware of what manner of programme it actually was.”

“And so, the producers asked me to play the role of a ‘cutesy princess who knows nothing about the world.’”

“To this day, I’ve adhered strictly to that image.”

“Since I don’t show my face, if I were to suddenly change my personality, people might suspect that there might be a new, different person behind me.”

“See how beautiful young female idols go through stressful things just as you beautiful young male idols do?”

—

*Pronouns are not commonly used in Japanese, and so Bishojo-senpai does not have a confirmed pronoun. 

Since it is left ambiguous in the story, I will be using “they” to match the Japanese text, since that is the closest English has to an ambiguous pronoun. (In some cases I may use others if they feel appropriate, but keep in mind that in the original JP, there is no specific pronoun being used.)

Incidentally, Hajime has always used “this person.”

Please feel free to interpret this character however you wish, as everyone will have a different interpretation based on cultural context.

*Utaite: (歌い手) is a Japanese term for people who cover previously released songs and post them on Nico Nico Douga and YouTube, but not limited to those two websites.

*Tomoya says that Bishojo-senpai ends their sentences with “desu no!” on variety shows, which sounds like a very posh, princessy way of speaking.

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NEXT CHAPTER

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Translation by:

Ara @. nazunyan427

Proofreader: 

Sophie @.ra_bits_daisuki

Parallel World - “Cuteness is Unjust” Chapter 2

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Nazuna:

It’d be like if you’d been a Swordmaster all along, but you were suddenly asked to change your class to a Sorcerer—to use a game as an example.

Tomoya:

Oh yeah, you play games, Nii~chan. That really surprises me.

Based on looks alone, I never would’ve guessed you had such otaku type hobbies. I would’ve taken you for someone who’s really into fashion, or even a normie. Something like that?

Hajime:

I definitely get you. I would’ve seen Nii~chan in the same way as my little sister. These days, she’s trying to act a lot more sophisticated and refined—the kind of person who not only has no interest in manga or games, but outright looks down on them altogether.

Nazuna:

No, not at all~ I got hooked back in school hearing all the blipblips from Mako-chin’s consoles and seeing how much he was enjoying himself. He taught me about all kinds of games, and it’s still a way for me to kill some time to this day.

Not that I have so much free time I need something to kill it. But if all I do is work and study, I’ll go insane.

Hajime:

I definitely understand! Wow, you always know how to express how I perfectly feel on my behalf, Nii~chan. I’m not good with words and I can’t express exactly what I want to say, so this is a huge help.

No, you’ve been a huge help all along. All this time.

Mitsuru:

Me too, me too! Thanks to Nii~chan thinkin’ over the hard stuff and knowin’ what to say, I never hafta to think about a thing! I can just dash straight ahead!

Tomoya:

You really should think for yourself every now and then.

Mitsuru:

I only wanna focus on the stuff I’m “best” at! Dash, dash, da~sh ☆

Tomoya:

Ahaha. Well, I suppose that’s the best way for you to be, Mitsuru.

(If anything, I’m the one with nothing in particular that I can be called “best” at, nor can I support everyone the same way Nii~chan can. I guess I’m the least useful one here.

I’m supposed to be Leader of Ra*bits, but I feel like I’ve got nothing to contribute.)

Nazuna:

What’s wrong, Tomo-chin? Something bothering you?

Now that we have the chance, feel free to let out all the complaints you have, no matter what it is. You’ll feel tons better. 

I keep saying this over and over, but that’s the whole reason we’re all here today.

Hajime:

Heh. It was actually supposed to be an afterparty to celebrate the end of SS. At least, that’s what we originally planned.

But we couldn’t get our schedules to match up, so time slipped by before we knew it.

Nazuna:

Yeah~ That’s why in the end we decided to go with a year-end celebration rather than SS specifically.

On top of that, we’re just in the same old staff canteen. I would’ve reserved a much fancier restaurant.*

Mitsuru:

But this way is better since it’s more casual, y’know?

Hajime:

That's right… If we went to some classy, grown-up restaurant, I’d probably be so nervous I wouldn’t even be able to taste the food.

Tomoya:

Right. We should really stick with the sort of place that matches our style the most.

…Hm? Oh, sorry, I need to take this.

Nazuna:

What’s up, Tomo-chin?

Tomoya:

It’s just… the agency contacted me over HoldHands.

Mitsuru:

Oh~ Maybe they have a new job for ya? *whistles* You’re in demand, Tomo-chan!

Tomoya:

Come on, it sounds like you’re making fun of me when you put it like that.

“Hello, yes? Sorry to keep you waiting.”

“Hmm? Yes, the rest of Ra*bits are here with me.”

Mitsuru:

Hm? This isn’t just about you, it’s about all of us?

Tomoya:

H-Hey, quit making such a fuss right next to me while I’m trying to talk on the phone. Your voice is so loud that I won’t be able to hear them.

“Oh, sorry. Yes… Yes… Huh?”

“No, err, I’m not quite sure what you mean by–”

Hajime:

Well, this seems ominous.

Nazuna:

It sure doesn’t sound like good news.

Tomoya:

“…All right, understood. We’ll head over right away.”

“Thank you for contacting me… If you’ll excuse me.”

Man… What was that all about? I have no idea…

Nazuna:

Uh… What’s wrong, Tomo-chin? What was that phone call about?

Tomoya:

Oh, sorry! First I need to report back to you guys… I mean, I should probably ask you if you’ve any idea what this could be about.

According to the agency, some major figure is furious with Ra*bits and is coming to lodge a complaint against us.

But does anyone even remember upsetting some influential figure in the industry?

–

Notes:

*He says this, but in his mini talks, Nazuna mentions that he asked Niki-chin to make them an extra special meal for the occasion. He says that what it is is a secret though.

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Translation by:

Ara @. nazunyan427

Proofreader: 

Sophie @.ra_bits_daisuki

Parallel World - Prologue

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Tomoya:

“Come on and kick the crap out of a world that’s rotten to the core!”

Mitsuru:

“**** [REDACTED]! **** [REDACTED]!”

Hajime:

“Listen up, **** [REDACTED]! Ya bunch of **** [REDACTED]! Never mind pretendin’ to be prissy lil’ goody-two shoes and  **** [REDACTED]!”

Nazuna:

“That’s it, lemme hear ya yell! Unleash your rage! Set your souls on fire! Spit in the face of everyone up on their high horse thinkin’ they’re so **** [REDACTED] virtuous!  **** [REDACTED]!”

(The first year after the founding of ES. End of March. Starmony Dorm Theater Room.)

Nazuna:

No way~ No more, I can’t bear to watch another second of this.

Mitsuru:

You seem real down, Nii~chan. You okay? Do ya have a fever? Hey, hey?

Hajime:

Th-That was certainly… intense. We did make a request for a version of us that would completely overthrow who we’ve been up until now…

But this doesn’t just overthrow who we are—it’s turned us into completely different people.

Tomoya:

Yeah… And maybe it’s because the technology is not entirely there yet, but we’re saying these shocking things and yet smiling as cutely as we always do. Composite footage really is incredible.

Hajime:

It does feel incredibly disharmonious, doesn’t it? …Just watching it makes me feel really out of sync, like, I’m getting all woozy.

Mitsuru:

Nii~chan, Nii~chan! What does “**** [REDACTED]” mean?

Nazuna:

Shtop that! All of you fwoget what you just saw wight now! Ewase that filth fwom your mind!

Mitsuru:

Oh… Nii~chan slurred his words for the first time in forever…

Hajime:

Well, it seems to be something that happens depending on his mental state. He tends to slur his words when he’s under heavy stress… Here, Nii~chan, drink some water and take some deep breaths.

Nazuna:

In… Out… Ugh, I can’t believe what we just watched. I’m gonna have nightmares about this.

I don’t think I need to say this to you guys, but there is NO WAY we’re doing anything like that.

I’m not letting any of you guys copy that. It doesn’t make any sense for our image as Ra*bits.

Mitsuru:

But then what should we do?

I thought we’re supposed to kick the crap out of our current image?

Nazuna:

Don’t say that! Watch your language!

Tomoya:

Niichan, you normally swear the most out of all of us… Kind of fascinating that you’re the one who’s having the most adverse reaction to this…

Nazuna:

I’m allowed to swear! I’m the claws and fangs of Ra*bits! If any assholes come for you guys, it’s my job to bite their fucking head off!

But I don’t want to hear you guys using foul language! I want you to stay pure and clean the way you all are now~!

Hajime:

But isn’t that where our problem lies in the first place? Or rather, we’ve reached a plateau—that’s why we’ve been told that we can’t stay the same cute, pure way we’ve been up until now.

It’s the whole reason we’re in a bind right now.

Tomoya:

Yeah. Why did this have to happen to us?

Mitsuru:

You guys are so dark! You’ve gotta smile about it, smile! Mr. Fortune comes to those who smile!

Tomoya:

And who exactly is “Mr. Fortune” supposed to be?

Nazuna:

Anyway! There’s no way we’re going down this road! 100% out of the question! Personally firing whoever came up with that idea! 

That said, I do accept I’m not the current leader of Ra*bits—and therefore the final call is Tomo-chin's to make and not mine.

So I don’t actually have the right to shut this down.

Tomoya:

It’s okay, Nii~chan. I’m sure everyone feels the same. I was seriously questioning what we just saw too. On top of being painful to watch, I just don’t think there’s any way we’d be able to reenact that sort of behavior in reality.

It's not possible to dress in the sort of clothes that are completely out of our style.

Mitsuru:

That’s right! Tomo-chan, you just said somethin’ super ordinary!

Tomoya:

Huh? I feel like I came up with a pretty creative metaphor, if you ask me.

Anyway. Thanks to pressure from our agency and That Senpai, it’s become necessary for us Ra*bits to change up our style.

I can’t believe we have to toss aside the “cute” direction we’ve been pursuing so far.

On top of that, finding a new style to pursue isn’t easy—it’s looking to be a huge hassle. I seriously wonder what we’re gonna do.

Hajime:

Well, I think all we can do for the time being is have a look at as many different styles as possible to expand our knowledge of what’s available. That’s why we’re exploring all these different kinds of Ra*bits right now.

We’ve been using the SSVRS technology to have the other idols take on our appearance.

In doing so, they’re letting us see a completely different version of ourselves while still looking exactly like us—and they’ve all agreed to help us out with this and play the part.

In other words, we’re seeing a “parallel world” version of ourselves.

Though the results don't really look too promising right now. I really get the feeling that the best option is to keep going exactly the way we are now.

I wonder just what is the right “answer”?

NEXT CHAPTER

—

Translation by:

Ara @. nazunyan427

Proofreader: 

Sophie @.ra_bits_daisuki